a song called transmog

(or "ants crawled on the skin of my bum and hot hot did the sun start to glower")

by Jessy Kendall

i take on fields
i take on creek beds
i take on piers
and tire treads
i become
pine needle slopes
i become
city garden plots
i become
lazy with hope.
this is for all the pets i ever loved before
that have died, got shotgunned, shut in the door
run over, lost in the woods while i cried
taken by hawks, ripped down by foxes,
frozen to death near the banks of some houses:

when i get up now
the thoughts overcome me.
i take special stances,
make special offers,
not to get run down, but
i am lazy truth incarnate.
i've had breakdowns from here
to texarkana damn it.
somemtimes i rhyme lines with lines i haven't written yet
and that confuses me.
my own brain seduces me.

i want pines
and the bugs to crawl around in my undershorts.
being in this sun is like having a tiger by the tail.
the son is a lion spread out through my veins
and there's nothing to do after seven p.m.
i feel like i'm fading into the day,
like i don't think of people 'less i can see them.
i shattered plates with josh
then glued that art to some back woods wash.
i entered the sun with a brain half dead
and came out of the park
as a gay handshake instead.
i need vitamins i need vitamins itching means healing that's what jonny
knoxville said.

hanging out midst the tree tops can get hyphy and green.
its that new-wave-installation-portal kinda feeling
where twig tips itch at atmosphere skin
and we all gather round to jump off.
so i gain some entry upon ignition-
break the sound barrier
with a last soul expansion
and dream of

windswept-red-sunset-oceanfront-fishing-with-the-children-and-the-like...
the-sit-upright-un-rejected-dragon-flies-all-around-me
apple-blossoms-descending-in-circles-tight-like-flight-til-they-find-me-
and-effortless-nosedive-into-sense-of-queen's-self unties me.

we travel in defense of these bright streets!
i hug you fiercely there.
we talk in the middle of this fervent neighborhood.
i witness your realness there!
we chug along like bells in this wet heat,
we chug along like bells on these old feet.

i sit amongst anthills and wind and roving backyard turkeys.
i get the summer i wanted even in the midst of my surgery;
having my belly sliced open wide
my insides pushed back inside.
i sat there til i got numb
in front of all those bright yellow flowers.

may and june '09