It's Veteran's Day here in the good old U S of A, and the holidays are right around the corner. What better time to reflect on the things that make this country, and its people, great? Let us give thanks for our ability, as Americans, to be the shining example to all other nations of the earth, civilized and uncivilized, in all facets of life. Our leading example washes over the globe daily in a red-white-and-blue tsunami of guidance as to (in order of importance):

What to buy - anything overpriced, useless in daily life, shiny/sparkley, on TV, endorsed by celebrities, things that are 'cute', and especially things that make the ridiculously difficult and time-consuming tasks of daily life (examples: using toilet paper, changing the channel, ignoring your children) easier.

Where to shop - Anywhere out of your price range, anywhere celebrities are photographed coming in and out of by paparazzi, anywhere with mostly unrecognizable (but subliminally appealing?) celebrity voice overs.

What to think is cool - Whatever 13 year old girls think is cool, or whatever novelists who write books aimed specifically at this demographic think is cool.

What to watch - Anything on television on any channel at any time day or night. Preferrably all of those things. DVR what you miss when you go to the bathroom (what, no toilet TV? Hick!), go to sleep (reluctantly), go to work (if you still HAVE to), and so on.

When enough wealth is enough - This one's important. NEVER! This is America, capitalism is flawless. 'Nuf said.

Who to hate -

Who to fear - Most everything. Especially that about which you know nothing. Especially that which you do not understand, either partially or fully. Anything from countries composed primarily of sand. Anything from countries that do not have four seasons but two, wet & dry.

Who to kill - Innocent civilians - whenever possible, wherever possible, in the name of security, democracy, etc. Unborn children. Doctors who kill unborn children. Mothers who let doctors kill their unborn children.

Who to blame - Usually, the terrorists. Sometimes, Russia. Sometimes, the Democrats; sometimes, the Republicans. NEVER the system.

Who to ignore - People who speak calmly, rationally, logically, people who are skeptical, people who see both sides of an issue, people who see the world in grey not black and white.

What to believe - What you read in 2,000 year old books and what you are told by people who've dedicated their lives to spreading the 2,000 year old message of said books.

What to keep - Your fear. Your old copies of Oprah Magazine, with her on EVERY cover (really?).

What to throw away - Your reason, logic, self-respect, and most importantly your ability to consider others, and to consider the long term future.

THAT's what we're fighting for.