We arrive at the park, but we’re still an hour’s drive from our lodge. Yosemite is nearly 1200 square miles of land. Get used to driving. On the one road that goes through the park. 
If we got lost on the trail, this would have been our “last seen” pic. We have everything we’ll need for 3 days inside our backpacks. (Yes, including toilet paper, plastic bags and a trowel. I mean EVERYTHING).
Stacked rocks are like breadcrumbs from other hikers to say “go this way.” They’re also overly used in spa commercials and meditation ads. 
That’s the mountain I saw years ago and said, “We have to hike up there.” First off – I’m deathly afraid of heights. Secondly - I was kind of obsessed with getting to the top of that mountain. I’m not sure what my issue is. Save me the shrink bills and tell me already. 
This was the warm meal we looked forward to at the end of the day. Freeze dried cuisine has really come a long way. My pasta primavera was paired nicely with filtered river water. 
On the trails, you could turn around and see Halfdome in the distance, just waiting. Taunting, really. (What’s my deal? ) 
Totally got photo-bombed by Half-Dome. “I’m gonna climb you so hard, Half Dome.” 
I was so anxious about Halfdome, I wildly underestimated the hike GETTING TO THE HARD PART! It’s called Subdome, and it’s steep enough to need stairs, but there weren’t any. I was on all fours whispering things to myself that I’ll never repeat in public. This was the view behind me.
The final climb to Halfdome is so steep, it has cables in to help hikers. The cables don’t stop you from falling, so, I wouldn’t call them ‘safety cables.’ Here’s where I saw a lot of hikers turn around due to perilous weather conditions. Coincidentally, that’s when I stopped obsessing about Half Dome. 
That’s as close to the final ascent as I got. Nestled between those two rocks. You’ll notice Pam got much closer. Maximum exposure with a wicked wind blowing, and she’s having a ball. (In a lot of ways, she’s my hero.) 
On our way down from Halfdome, I’m relieved to be alive and found out that clouds aren’t made of cotton. They’re just fog, only not as sexy. 
We were dead-tired and had to find a spot to set up camp before the sunset. However, the trail we were on went through a burn zone – unsafe because dead branches fall on tents and kill backpackers every year.
We found a spot to camp about 200 yards down a ridge near the John Muir Trail. This view greeted us in the morning as we headed back
Aside from freeze-dried meals-in-a-bag we ate in the evenings, beef jerky, life savers and this was our sustenance. Lots of this. Seriously, man. LOTS. 
Sometimes, your hike would open up in to a gorgeous meadow. Tucked away in the left side of the picture are the High Sierra Campsites, a popular place for hikers and backpackers alike. 
We emerged from the trail 3 days after we started – there was a general store with food and a post office attached. I ordered a bacon-cheeseburger and a cup of hot coffee. I was in heaven. 
After coming off the trail, the next bus wouldn’t arrive for 4 hours. So, I pulled cardboard out of a recycling bin, borrowed a sharpie and Pam made a sign. As we’re walking out of the parking lot toward the road, 2 microbiologists named Alexa asked us if we needed a ride. Our first hitchhiking effort took a total of 5 minutes and 20 seconds. And we scored a ride. With 2 microbiologists. Both named Alexa. 
After cursing out Google Maps for leading us to a cattle road, we found Nelder’s Grove, a place south of Yosemite park with tall trees. Really tall trees. 
I counted how many steps it took for me to walk around the trunk of this tree. I can’t remember what it was, but it had to be big. Why else would I do it, right?
This is the view you see coming through a tunnel headed to Yosemite Valley. It’s also the view you’ll see if you Google Yosemite Park. It’s kind of the park’s calling card. So, if the Internet doesn’t have enough of this shot, we have 80 of our very own. This is one of them. 
If you ever have a conversation with a rock climber, this is the name to drop. While we were there, we saw at least 12 climbing teams sleeping suspended on the rock face to continue their climb the next day. (I climbed the first four feet of El Cap while there, so . . . yeah.)
The lighting was perfect and the kiss was wetter than necessary. 
Stop taking life so seriously, she is constantly reminding me. And I’m the comedian? If you only knew . . .
Just across from El Cap is a stunning meadow that catches the sunlight perfectly. Pam snapped this one. 
It’s not about the destination, it’s about the journey. I This was taken as we approached Clouds Rest, the 2nd mountain peak we attempted. 
I fully didn’t expect to see large lakes so high up, but yet, there they were. Gorgeous lakes about 5000 feet up the mountain. 
We made it! We were 9,931 feet in the air. I promised to feel pride and accomplishment at overcoming my fear of heights once I was closer to sea level. 
MY body is saying, “Hell yeah!” but my eyes are saying “HEEEELLLLLPPPPPP!!!!!”
So, we had someone take our picture. It wasn’t until weeks later, Pam told me our eyes are closed. 
We had our eyes open this time. The final ascent to the top of Clouds Rest was among the most scared I’ve been in a long time.
We took some pix, had a snack and turned around to get down the mountain . . . carefully. Very carefully.